Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Yet Another Bathroom Experience

What is it with me and bathrooms lately?

I just went to the bathroom here at work. There's one single stall private bathroom but it was occupied. I had to use the one that patients and visitors use here near the financial office. Inside the bathroom, there's two stalls and one of them is handicapped.

I, of course, not being an ass, use the non-handicapped one.

I'm sitting there on the potty doing my business when I hear the main door open. I don't think anything of it until this tiny pair of Crocs stop in front of my closed door. I hear the door rattle and then...HORROR OF HORRORS...two little hands touch the floor and I see the beginning of the ends of hair.

She was about to look under my stall door!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

While I was peeing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A strange little girl was about to see me pee.

I quickly hollered out, "Someone's in here sweetie". Before I could see her little eyes peering at me, she bounced up and went into the stall next to mine (the handicapped stall). I finish up and the ATF (automatic toilet flushing piece of shit) goes off before I'm halfway up off the pot and my ass (as usual) gets splashed (thankfully it happens after it's flushed down whatever was in the pot so it's at least clean water).

I unlock my door and exit the stall. I swear, it's like she was waiting for me to exit the stall. As soon as she heard my lock click, she came barreling out of her stall and said (with a lisp) "I can't use this one".

I just stared at her and went to the sink to wash my hands. I hear her ask me "Watcha doin?" and I turn around and she's right up on me! I mean, her little face is about 6 inches from my butt (that's how "tall" she was). I almost stumbled on her! I explained I was washing my hands and she said, "Oh" and went back to the stall.

I finished washing and drying my hands and left.

Strange.

Later,

Mama Dawg

6 really cool people who give a rat's patootie:

Julie

Where's mom???

Heather

Maybe the automatic flushing toilets were causing her some alarm. They freak my kids out.

Heck, they freak me out. You never know when they're going to go off. Move half an inch, and you're toast.

insane mama

Sheesh, I'm a JERK, I use the handicapped stalls without even thinking, and yea the automated flushing things ARE SCARY and so are CROCS!

Lisa

I HATE when my ass gets splashed with water from that damn automatic flusher.

You have to go check out my post dated April 9, 2008 "Trying Hard Not to Laugh".....

LiteralDan

I hate the automatic flushers also-- I'm no germophobe, but I have no desire to be misted by the water from a public toilet.

Am I the only one who shuddered when reading that she put her hands on the floor of a public bathroom? (I just shuddered again)

Mama Dawg

Julie-I assume the mom was in the waiting room....10 feet away.

Heather-Yeah, she might have been afraid of that. I thought of that later.

Insane Mama-I use 'em, too. But mostly in places like public places. Here in the hospital, chances are far higher that a handicapped person is going to need a stall, so I try not to use 'em here. I agree about Crocs. Can't stand 'em.

Lisa-I'll go check out that post. I've been meaning to start your blog from the beginning. Just gotta find the time.

Dan, that is exactly what I thought was so disturbing about the whole experience. The hands on the floor. I HOPE she washed her hands.

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