My Crappy Morning (That Started The Night Before)

Days like today are the kind that make you want to just give up.

It actually all started last night.

First of all, I needed to come into work a half hour early so I could get off a half hour early to go pick up J.D. at the vet by 5. It will take me an hour and a half to get from my work to the vets office. So, I have to leave here by 3:30.

Having said that, I needed to be out the door by 6:30 at the latest this morning. I got out the door at 6:35. Not too bad considering what happened.

I have tons and tons of things I need to do and not having light of my life at home, well, it just makes it easier for me to get them done.

Well, nothing got done last night. The house was so empty without light of my life, my mom and J.D. in the house. I actually got lonely. All I could do was wander around the empty house and mope.

Then, after I had finally made a decision to cook dinner and had sat down to eat it, Mike (my other cat) decided he was lonely too and jumped up on the side table next to the couch and spilled my iced tea all over the rug and the floor. It scared him so much, he pushed off my leg while USING HIS CLAWS and now I have a nice 7 inch scratch (looks like a zipper track) on my left thigh. It was deep enough that blood was dripping down my leg. Gross.

That was the first of several liquid situations I found myself in.

I fell asleep on the couch and woke up around 1:47 am. I noticed that my cell phone battery was getting low. I have to have my cell phone as it's my alarm clock as well. Since I had been traveling, I had my charger packed...somewhere. It took me 20 minutes, but I finally found it.

Luckily for me, Mike decided to forgive me for scaring the crap out of him (that's the way he thinks. I just know he blames ME for putting the iced tea cup there to begin with) and hopped up on the bed to sleep with me.

I got up in time to get ready. It only takes me a half hour to get ready (this includes getting breakfast and lunch ready for me).

My routine is to get up, pee and then go to the kitchen to make coffee. Well, I had forgotten that yesterday morning, after I poured myself a cup, I had taken the coffee pot and put it in the sink to wash.

I poured the water in, put in the coffee and turned it on.

Without a coffee pot to catch all the coffee.

I didn't notice this at first because when I was turning around to get breakfast ready, I noticed that Mike had peed in the kitchen near his food bag.

Oh, shit. He has never peed in the kitchen before. Because I was gone for three days, there are currently two litter boxes in the bathroom. Both of them clean. There was no reason for him to pee in the kitchen. The only thing I could think of was that he was depressed because J.D. wasn't home.

So, about that time, I heard a dripping and looked up and discovered the coffee dripping off the microwave (the coffee machine stays on top of the microwave, I have a really tiny kitchen).

Double shit.

So, I clean the coffee mess first and get a new pot started (with the coffee pot in place, this time).

Then, I stepped in the cat pee. Luckily for me, I recognized this and instead of stepping back and tracking pee all over the kitchen, I just took my shoe off and left it there.

I had to get a trash bag and set the cat food bag inside of it so I could scoop out all the food. The cat food bag is layered with several layers of wax lining, so the pee had not penetrated the interior of the bag. In fact, it hadn't even penetrated the exterior portion of the bag, so it had to be pretty fresh.

So, I'm on my hands and knees smelling like coffee and cat pee while in my nightgown and with only one shoe on.

I get all that cleaned up and thrown out in the trash and get ready for work. I have to take a quick shower just to smell normal. By this time, I only had 10 minutes to shower, get dressed, get my coffee in my to go mug, get my lunch and scrounge up some money for my breakfast since I clearly had no time to get any ready before leaving.

I actually got it all done.

Major miracle.

Until....

....triple shit....


....I get ready to leave. I have my coffee in my to go mug and set it down on a table to get my keys to lock up and my cup goes flying off the table by the door and lands on the floor. Coffee spills EVERYWHERE!!!!!!

I am so tempted at this point to just yell "Fuck it" and go on to work.

Well, I did yell "Fuck it" but I didn't leave. I was a good little cleaner upper and cleaned up the coffee spill.

That's what put me 5 minutes behind.

Luckily, I got to work with three minutes to spare.

I swear, the gods were against me this morning.

I sincerely hope that the reason they did all this to me was because they wanted me to get on the road a few minutes later to avoid some sort of catastrophe.

At least, that's what I'm gonna believe.

Otherwise, I might just have to go home and have a good long cry.

Later,

Mama Dawg