Friday, April 3, 2009

Who...Whooooo...Whoooooo Da Heck Is THIS?


Aw, don’t looks so disappointed. OK, wait right there...


Just kidding! About the naked part. It really is me. Oh, wait, who is me you say? Me is Jess over at This Life is Mine. Momma Dawg told me she would kick me in the throat asked very nicely if I would write a lil sumpin sumpin while she was off gallivanting in New Orleans.

Riddle me this…if you tell someone you are going to be out of town, then you GIVE them the keys to your residence… and that someone to whom you gave the key is someone whom you KNOW is going to be throwing a kegger, which of course then includes keg stands, why on earth would you leave your Waterford crystal out where someone could/maybe/kinda sorta/quite possibly break said valuable?

Ignorance says I.

Speaking of being put in charge…I have been asked, by various people from my graduating class, to get together our 10 year high school reunion. I was not the president of our class, I was voted most comical, so I hope they knew what they were doing when they asked me.

It may sound strange, (HA!) but I was not one to follow rules. Rules are for fools! I graduated from a very strict, very Southern Baptist Christian school. I was NOT the ideal Southern Baptist Christian school graduate. Therefore, at our reunion, there will be smoking, drinking, cursing and absolutely NO 15 minute prayers before we eat. I am just rebellious like that.

I wanted to bring some of my favorite strippers, sing karaoke and have a wet t-shirt contest, but have been advised against it. I guess I should just be happy that there will be a bar.

And now my mind is wondering…I think it might have been the mention of karaoke. Or strippers.

I have two more topics to cover here in this rambling post:

1. Savannah, Georgia and its ridiculous thieves.

2. Made up blog awards

First of all, Savannah. In the past year my Jeep has been broken into at least three times. Two of those times they unzipped the windows like a normal thief, the last time, they decided to cut a hole in the window. Each time, nothing was taken except change from the change holder and everything was strewn about.

When we left to go on vacation last month we received a call from our upstairs neighbors that some dude was trying to steal our motorcycles. This is retarded for many reasons. First of all the forks are locked on the motorcycle. Secondly, my motorcycle alone weighs close to 500lbs. You can’t exactly pick it up and walk away. Lastly, if you can afford to get a truck and a trailer to drag it onto the trailer then you have no need to steal a motorcycle.

SO, last night, Larkin was at my house for about 2 hours helping me with my 30 pack of Keystone. We all walk outside and discover that someone, while we were only 30 feet away, with the windows open, stole her spare tire from the back of her Honda CRV. They were kind enough to leave the lug nuts and the tire cover. Who the hiz-ell steals A TIRE. Really? Just ONE tire. Is the need for a 16 inch tire that great? Who does that?!

So a lovely police lady came to write the report and told us that there was also another tire stealing just a few blocks away. I thought, “Hey! This should be an easy one to catch! Just look for the guy carrying two tires and a tire wrench thingy!” However, it appears that police work is not that simple.

Now on to made up blog awards.

I have four to share with you. Peep ‘em and steal ‘em if you like.

Thanks for reading and much love to you all!

17 really cool people who give a rat's patootie:


You are like the Flash man, you were here in Savannah last night, and this morning you are in Mississippi, wow. I knew you were AWSOME, but damn! Now go clean your tattoo.

And I'm still pissed off about my tire.

Hurry back Mama!!! We like, miss you, and stuff.


OMG, whoever posted those awards is hilarious! OK, I am done patting myself on the back now...ow owww ouch!! Damn my new tattoo hurts...


Those awards are awsome.

Bobby G

Those awards are bad ass! Also Id be a huge fan of that reunion! Im graduated in 1997, I could pass for 99! lol


As Bobby said. Bad ass.


I love your awards! The tat one. I think I pee'd myself a bit laughing. Shhh don't tell anyone.

Mama Dawg

I simply ADORE the person who made up these awards and did a KICK ASS post for me in my absence.

Why am I here you ask? Couldn't I have done a blog post in New Orleans since I obviously have access to a computer?

Well, yeah, but duh.....I'm on a mini-vaca. Screw working of any kind!

Love ya Jess. *smooches*


Ohhhhhhhhh the's too much!! It's tooooo much! OK, keep going...


Hey, how can we get an invite to that Waterford crystal breaking party? Ooops, I mean, have a safe trip, Mama Dawg. :-)

Captain Dumbass

Butt dimples. I love you, Jess.


Capt D - aren't they a thing of wonder. I have been drooling all morning.

sassy stephanie

Well hi Jess, nice to meet ya. I'm Sassy Pants. And I must say, sad to see MD's not around, but know she needs tha FUN. I'm so glad to find you over here today.

You totally sound like my kinda girl, so, from here on out, I will most likely be stalking you.

TEN year? You baby. Forget bringing the strippers to the party. Why not have the reunion in a strip club? That'd be tons of fun.


Hey Sassy Pants - we prefer the term "investigating" over here on this side of blogland. Stalking...such a harsh word.

10 years, indeed not 50, however, the lapse in time finally gets it's own name - a decade!

Glad you dropped by!! Thank you!!

steenky bee

I love that Jess made that badge. It takes a strong woman to do that, or jump that high. Congrats to you!!!


Steenky - in the original edit there were shout outs to whom I made the awards for...however, in posting, somehow that got lost. LET IT BE KNOWN: THE YOUR BLOG MAKES ME JUMP AWARD WAS MADE FOR STEENKY ORIGINALLY!

Momo Fali

I'm pretty sure the head of the donkey is on top of the shoulders in that last photo.


Momo - good call. I totally checked and you are right!

MD - seriously, how long can one person be gone for?!? I believe we should plan our vacations together next year...that way no one is impatiently waiting on the other to return.

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