Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Black Hole of Nothingness...

...is what I have.

So, you get the joy of reading incredibly random crap about my life.

Yay you!

**First of all, behold Light of my Life's school pic.

Awesome, isn't it? Anybody want to lock her down for their son now? If so, I'm taking bids names.

**I recently bought a bunch of mini bananas. On the sticker on the bananas was this set of instructions. "For best results peel from the top down". Seriously? You need instructions on how to peel a banana? Even a monkey knows how to do that...for real...monkeys really know how to do that. How many kinds of stupid do you have to be to not know that?

**I was recently listening to the live version of Maroon 5’s “The Sun” and at the end, he says something like “I didn’t tell the band I was gonna do this but I have another song for you” and then "In Your Room" by the Bangles starts up. My first thought? "Cool, Maroon 5's covering the Bangles" before I realized I had my iPod on shuffle.

**Look at the pic below. Isn't that cool? C, my neighbor's kid, lined up her M & M's this way before she ate them. I thought it made a neat picture.

Kinda segues into the next pic.

This was in my yard yesterday. For reals, y'all. It was like 6 feet 4 inches long.

**Amazing Race and Survivor are starting soon! And HEROES started LAST NIGHT y'all! I'm on the edge of my seat. It was a TERRIFIC episode (two technically). I heart Peter so much. (the character, not the stupid name of a man's johnson....although....)

**The pic below is the sight from my front porch on Sunday morning. Light of my life and her friend M brought out most of her baby doll stuff and played house outside Sunday morning after she and her sister (the above mentioned C) spent the night on Saturday night while their parents went to his 20th high school reunion. Hahahahahaha, L, I still have 7 years to go before mine.

**Someone sent this to me in an e-mail. It's too short for it's own post, so I'll do it here.

My 4444 (WTF?)

Four places that I go to over and over:
Shell Station
My neighbor's house (although since I just insulted L, that might not be the case anymore...sorry L!)

Four people who e-mail me regularly:
Jaymie from the boards

Four of my favorite places to eat:
My neighbor's when they're having L's KICK ASS deer meat (there, L, I think I've kissed your ass enough now...please let me have beer)
Macaroni Grill
Bangkok (hee, hee, I wrote kok) Thai

Four places I would rather be right now:
Disney World
a tropical island
Canada (that's for the two men who compete for my imagined affections, Trooper Thorn and Captain Dumbass)
My bed

**My mom wrote an article about our Gustav evacuees and they ran it along with two of my photos in our local paper. And, they just told me that they want me to send a pic of Jesse and his story for publication. In addition, my kid is always in the paper for her various awards and whatnot. Plus, she just got her pic taken for the special "Good Morning" section of the paper. We're FAMOUS y'all! My "list" of demands is gonna appear here soon. And I'm a DIVA when it comes to getting what I need want.

**I'll tie this up now. The below pic shows just HOW MUCH my cat J.D. loves me. He puts up with my stinky feet near his face. I love how his little paw is gently resting on my foot. I love it when he does this but he always does it at an inopportune time...like when I need a glass of wine or I need to pee. Cats are funny like that. (yeah, those are x's on my feet, I didn't want y'all judging my feet...believe me, they wouldn't win any awards)

That's all I got peeps.


18 really cool people who give a rat's patootie:

American in Norway

Your daughter is adorable... & I think it is so funny you put x's on your feet....I would do the same thing... cause I AM a FOOT Judger! Seriously...& I don't want anyone judging my feet... weird minds think a like!

The Nice One

Awww! I love the girls playin' outside.
Congrats on bein' so famous and all!!
And the cat...how sweet. I woulda put big old x's over my feet too!


lol....i love the randomness of you life.....

Jennifer and Sandi

I love the kids partying in the front yard photo! Now that is priceless! I'd frame that one and put it up!!!!!!


- Jennifer


That's a great school pic. She's so cute! I saw mini banans at the store yesterday and I almost bought them. Are there any differences other than the mini aspect? I'm glad they put banana-peeling instructions on there--I used try chipping the peel off w/ my fingernails from the center of the banana. j/k!


I'm going to have to disagree with you on the banana thing. We had this debate at work a few years ago about the proper way to peel a banana. Turns out I was doing it wrong. I know! So ever since then, I cower in the corner when I eat a banana. Because of the shame in my awkward peeling and also I don't eat phallic shaped things in public.


I LOVE instructions on things. Or warning labels. Like I have this electronic device. It's on my key ring. And you press it if you are listening to the radio and a song comes on - but you don't know who it is. Later, you can plug it into your computer and it will tell you everything about the song. And this device has a label on it. Saying "device will not work if ingested." Because my first thought was to eat it. Sheesh!

Oh, and wasn't Heroes great last night??


I didn't see Heroes last night but I have it recorded so I can watch it soon.

I love the cat on your feet. SO sweet. What do the cats think of your new pet Jesse?

I love the M&M snake...the insect below was cool looking, though creepy. What was it?

The girls on the front lawn was adorable, and that school picture was way too cute! I'll take her for one of my boys. :o) That way we can hang out. :o)

I like your Canadian boyfriends. I have fun reading them...and then all y'alls flirty banter in the comments.

That's so cool you had some pictures published! And that they want to run a story on Jesse. You ARE getting famous. Sigh. I knew you when.


your daughter is a cutie!

and oh my goodness HEROES! Last night was so great. I love the confusion! I am guessing this new Tracy is Nikki Sanders twin sister she thought was dead. yeah, I am probably completely wrong. ha!

and did you know if you peel a banana from the bottom, the peel will catch all those icky strings. ;)


Thanks for the linky love, sweetie. I know it was a bit of a downer post but downer stuff happens. I love the pic of loml. She is too cute.

Swirl Girl

You got more than me!

love the banana peeling instructions. file that under 'the dumbing down of america'

Blessings From Above

Your daughter is adorable! That is one of the best school pictures EVER!

Trooper Thorn

From the Black Hole emerge responses:
Your LifeLight is adorable, and so far Danger Boy is not spoken for (although the child-bride thing is moving more out of vogue in Canada).

You realize the instructions are on bananas because some idiot was unable to peel it correctly and it resulted in some horrendous injury and lawsuit.

I was about to pick up and relocate to Mississippi until I saw that picture of the centipede and have decided to stay on Vancouver Island with the bears and cougars.

We'll have to content ourselves with a long-distance relationship until your state gets serious about extermination of the creepy-crawlies.

Captain Dumbass

My kids are currently going bat-shit crazy. Once they've fallen into an exhausted sleep I'll come back and read your post.

Momo Fali

You CRACK me up! First the Bangles story made me laugh out loud, but the x's on your feet? HILARIOUS!

Random bit about me...a good friend of ours won Survivor Vanuatu.

I think you and I should go on the Amazing Race together. What do you think? I can't sign up with my husband because we'd kill each other before we ever got close to the $1 million.


Oh, that picture of Light is ADORABLE. Alas, I have no sons to arrange a marriage with. But if I did...

...love Maegan

aaaaaahahahahaha...lock her down! She IS adorable. her hair looks perfect! I've never seen a school photo come out so nicely. congrats!


Your child is gorgeous. That thing in your yard is gross. Your feet don't smell at all funky. At least from where I'm sitting.

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